How many times?

   I have began to read the Old Testament, where I had left off some time ago. Deuteronomy to be exact. I had no expectations to hear something profound from God, just to learn history. However, God always has other plans.
   I was reading in Chapter one, thinking about them silly Israelites, who have seen Seas parted, Manna fall from heaven, amazing Miracles and still had trouble believing. I read a blog one day by a lady whom I love to read, Kari Patterson ( Kari's blog ). She mentioned how she gets irritated at them and then realizes that we do the same thing.
   This go around, I felt the same way.
   How many times has God called me one way and I hesitate...I say, "But God, surely that is not Your plan..." "But God, I can not afford to do that...." "God....I am not ready...."
   How many times have I seen You move amazingly. You move mountains, You reach the lost, You are kindhearted and loving, You make miracles out of nothing, You make ways where there once was no way, and yet....I still hesitate or argue.
   I was challenged and humbled when I read these words :
  "Then I said to you, 'Do not be terrified, or afraid of them.  The Lord your God, who goes before you, He will fight for you, according to all He did for you in Egypt before your eyes, and in the wilderness where you saw how the Lord your God carried you, as a man carries his son, in all the way that you went until you came to this place.' Yet, for all that, you did not believe the Lord your God, who went in the way before you to sear out a place for you to pitch your tents, to show you the way you should go, in the fire by night and in the cloud by day." Deuteronomy 1: 29-33
   How can I ask or a better word would be argue with God when He goes before me, when He searches out a place to pitch my tent, when He fights for me, when He carries me....?
   So I pray that next time He calls me somewhere, I will read this verse and pray that I remember it. That God would cast out all fear in my life because He has got me! I pray that you would also remember these words and not be in fear when He calls you to do something or go somewhere!